I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
