Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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