My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
