I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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