So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
