I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize