dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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