I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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