i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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