and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
How naked do you want me to be?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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