So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Shame is for Republicans.
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