Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize