He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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