So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
