so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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