i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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