As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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