Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
my liver is dry heaving
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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