Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Randomize
