I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
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