i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
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