..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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