There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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