where does the pee come out of this thing
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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