Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
