Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
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