we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
