I hate your face
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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