you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
