Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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