from now on my penis is your penis
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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