This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
