I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
