my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
