words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize