did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Randomize
