i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I can't turn off my feet"
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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