She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
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Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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