This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
