i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
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