Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize