Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize
