Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
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i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
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My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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