that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Randomize
