My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
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I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
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Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
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