it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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