This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
