your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
time to smoke my breakfast
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
