People with herpes should wear stickers.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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