So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
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I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
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She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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