I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
