Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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